How To Use Equine-Guided Success Principles To Achieve Goals
With the New Year and the thought of fresh possibilities stirring through our minds, I offer the first principle from equine-guided success principles to help you achieve your goals this year. Whether you are working toward the achievement of personal or professional goals, there are many things I have learned from watching humans and horses work together.
Principle #1 – Take 100% Responsibility
The first equine-guided success principle is: Take 100% responsibility for yourself. That means 100% responsibility for all of your thoughts, feelings, actions, behaviors, assumptions and projections, etc… That means you will absolutely have to let go of the ‘blame game’.
When things aren’t going the way we pictured or hoped, many humans tend to blame other people or things. Typically the first ones we blame are our parents. Next in line as the recipients of our blame are our spouse, the kids, our boss, our colleagues, the economy, and/or the weather. If none of those excuses satisfy, then we go further out and blame the stars for not being properly aligned.
It simply never occurs to most humans to look in the mirror for the source of challenges or problems. In fact the very last place anyone wants to look is at oneself.
If you want to begin and finish this year differently, you will have to think and act differently. There is only one person responsible for the quality of your life – and that person is you. You must give up complaining, blaming and playing the victim when things don’t go as planned. Instead you can determine to see the challenge or ‘problem’ as an opportunity for growth, learning. Then you can learn to ask more fruitful questions, starting with, “How did I create that?” and, “What can I do differently to get the result I want?”
How Horses Respond To Humans Out Of Alignment With Truth
If you ask a horse to take a walk with you, and the horse refuses, you can go ahead and blame the horse. You can say that the horse is being stubborn, the horse doesn’t want to work and the horse just wants to eat. You can even take the stance of not wanting to be pushy. Some people go so far as to think that, “maybe the horse doesn’t like me.” This is typical of what many people do in life when people don’t act the way we think they should or we don’t achieve the success we think we deserve.
The truth of what’s going on with the horse is very different. Horses feel an energetic split when something is off in the environment. When people are ‘pretending’, rather than acknowledging what is true, or when they are scared, anxious, bored or indifferent, they often put on a happy face, pretending to be strong, engaged or fearless. Horses feel the energy in the same way they would feel a predator that is pretending it is not hiding behind the bush ready to pounce. So in that moment of pretense, the horse doesn’t feel safe in the presence of the human. If the horse cannot get away from that split or untrue energy, they can become increasingly agitated which is potentially dangerous. This is always a cue that something is “off” in the environment.
We Humans Feel The Split Too
People feel this energetic “split” with each other as well, but all too often ignore it, and/ or attempt to over-compensate in some way. Since it is a human tendency to blame the “other”, we are continuously producing an energetic split that is felt as viscerally as a discordant sound track. We are not living true, but are in a constant state of pretence.
In my coaching when working with humans and horses, if it is obvious there is a split, I might ask the participant, “What’s going on for you right now?” Or, “What are you responsible for producing?” When a person, after seeing the horse being restive in their presence, changes their thought and can take another action or try something else that is connected to their true intention, they will then see the horse calm down and walk with them.
When a person sees how changing their thought affects a 1000-pound horse, which I call a 1000-pound mirror, it’s fairly easy to understand how our misaligned thoughts and feelings affect all aspects of our lives. We can begin to then take full responsibility for the things we don’t like in our lives, our lack of motivation, unhappiness, lack of production or whatever it may be. This single principle – take 100% responsibility for your actions – when practiced daily, can change your life.
Give it a shot this year. If you would like to further explore how horses can help create more effective teams, custom equine-guided experiential programs can be designed for specific groups, businesses and organizations around any number of relevant issues and/or topics.